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* I've got 3 books to read for various book clubs! One of my goals for this year was to try to find a book club to join. It started out... rocky, which is why I signed up for a bunch.

A while back I found a queer book club via Meetup, only to realize that they were reading Irreparable Damage. (I was still seeing a therapist at the time and they tried to get me to go to the meeting because surely, they were reading it just to refute it. Transphobic queer groups in Portland, how could that be????? I didn't go, but I was confident that's not why they were reading it. I snooped in the group a bit afterwards and confirmed I was right.)

Add in some picks and suggestions for the first month of the year for a few clubs, I thought I was going to barely be able to attend because these clubs were just going to be dominated by authors I do not fuck with. But, suddenly, things seemed a lot better. Two Rivers, a bookstore that runs a queer book club, put out their book list for the whole year and it's all... good. Some of the picks are on my TBR list already. For the horror book club, if any of these authors suck I am blissfully unaware. The trans book club I can probably lightly steer towards authors I am okay with just because most of them don't even seem to even know any, so just having a very solid recc lists means that a lot of what we read with probably be from my list. And if they do pick something I have a problem with for one month, I can just skip that month. In the meantime, I am getting my list polished.

I mean, I am going to read a bunch of stuff I don't like to stay active in these clubs but there's a massive difference between 'ugh, YA again' and 'so this author has made some comments on podcasts that are so vile I am going to need a powerpoint presentation to even explain their rancid viewpoint'

* I should really make a post about that weird situation with Emilia Perez getting like a dozen Oscar noms for transmediaclub but I just can't handle wading through all this.

If you haven't heard about this fucking mess watch this musical number and then think about the fact that this movie got 13 noms. It ranks in Oscars history based on number of noms alone. More than Wicked!

This clip of Trixie and Katya talking about it is good, though. With all the controversies that the lead is suddenly in, the movie's hopefully wont actually win any Oscars. (Because none of this is about the film's quality, it's about... fucking Hollywood acting like a parody of itself) I am going to get upset over this crap if I actually make a proper post about it and I have enough other stuff to be upset about

* It's even odds that I am going to post a rant soon about people talking about trans people and experience in Portland. The whole acting like this place is magic and filled with 'trans people everywhere' and 'no place here would discriminate, why would you even ask that'. I don't want to rant, I want to fucking do something, find this magical alternate portland that I cannot see because I am under a dark curse. I don't want to sit here figuring out the best way to express how fucking awful my experiences have been, I want to go have a good experience. I want to be able to ask a question and get support, instead of people making fun of me or making gross assumptions about me.

* anyway fuck this i am off to shoot a dragon

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Portland's Winter Lights Festival is being set up and I've got a completely unrealistic list of shots I want to get. Hopefully, I manage at least something