(no subject)

[olivermoss]

I am back from Oregon City where I was briefly stranded in a McMenamins... I'll explain soon, I am trying to do my photography posts in order so my brain doesn't fall apart and I will get caught in those soon.

Anyway, I may have bought a ticket to the Broadway performance of the Stranger Things prequel story, which begs two questions. Okay, once you put aside 'did you think this through' and 'oh god you trusted the first google result to actually be the ticket seller, are you sure you bought a ticket?' there are two more questions:

One - What to wear? I recently bought this bolo tie because I decided that it's the most trans-masc possible thing to have that as an accessory. I would love to find a medium dark grey shirt, lightly textured, and slacks to make an outfit around it. (Similar to the shirt pictured, but textured instead of flat color) Or, hrmm...

Two - I haven't been back east since my parents died. If I am going to be in NYC, do I want to take the same commuter train my Dad took 5 days a week for decades to my hometown and walk around? One problem with this is that I no longer have a residency card so I can't get anywhere. The house was cleaned out before I even had a chance to think about going out and I don't want to go stare at a house owned by strangers. I am not going to attempt to approach any of my old schools (I'm from Connecticut, near a certain town, the schools have security now even though it's not strange adults who...) I could probably go to the family church, where my Dad's service that I wasn't invited to was held? I could get a water taxi and look at the places I can't go?

Yeah, there's reasons I haven't tried to go back at all. I can't go to the parks, the golf course, tennis courts, playgrounds, beaches, islands, etc. I could buy a bagel and legally go into the liquor store I cut through trying to ditch cops who didn't believe I lived in that town and wanted to bring me back where I came from. (I dressed like a boy but had long hair, boy + long hair = trailer trash and they wanted to put the trash where it belonged. I could not possibly be from these nice suburbs.)

Yeah, I guess not. I've posted about this before. I can't figure out anything to do there that isn't just... dramatically emo because I can't fucking go anywhere.

Comments

[dine]

I guess if you must be stranded somewhere, a McMenamins isn't the worst place!

if you honestly cannot go to any of the places/areas that are part of your past, I'd say there's no real reason to go.

[olivermoss]

The one down there was really nice! My past few visits to a McMenamins was the one in St Johns which is pretty, but the service is awful.

Yeah, it feels weird to be 40 minutes away and not go. But, I've spent a lot of time thinking about flying back and seriously trying to find anything to do and yeah, that is about it. It's all walled off and the coastline is private, unlike the west coast where the actual coastline is public.

[muccamukk]

I really like the bolo tie. I hope the outfit comes together around it. You're gonna look very smart!

All of those options do indeed sound dramatically emo. Like I get the temptation, but at the same time it sounds like a certain flavour of self-inflicted emotional damage. I'm not sure what the benefit would be.

[olivermoss]

Thanks!

Yeah, being 40 minutes away and not going feels weird, but like you said, it all sounds more like emotional self harm than anything. When I realized about the water taxis I was actually excited for a minute and then realize just how ridiculous and overwrought that would be.

[mistressofmuses]

It sucks that you can't really go back. I've heard *of* places that are like that, so tightly controlled/controlling about who is allowed in and all, but I haven't ever actually *been* anywhere like that. Probably because I'd be escorted out. (Here there are a few specific housing developments that I'd say have that attitude, but not whole towns.) I'm sorry that it's like that.

That bolo tie is cool as shit though.

[olivermoss]

I lived there and had the cops try to escort me out repeatedly! Connecticut is a place. My Mom actually used to get upset at the idea we'd never be able to go back after they were gone and I was always like "I would never want to come back here, it's okay"

Thanks!

[mistressofmuses]

That is fucking wild to me. Yeah, I can't say I'd *want* to go back to a place like that either, but... jeez.